Tomorrow is chemo day. I must admit I'm dreading it. :(

I have it in my head the side effects are going to be worse, that seems to be the pattern. It's hard to stay positive while experiencing muscles and bones ache, nausea and puking my guts out. Feeling queasy and constipated constantly are the norm. Sorry...TMI. My face and neck turn red, it feels like a sunburn, only burning from the inside out. I constantly feel a burning, numb, itchy sensation on the bottom of my feet and palms of my hands.  My face, especial my eyes, are puffy and swollen. My tongue is swollen and tingly. Swallowing has becme difficult. I get strange cravings. Avoiding dehydration is nearly impossible. I sleep ten hours, wake up tired and weak. I stumble downstairs, eat breakfast, then back upstairs for a nap. Getting ready for the day nearly wipes me right out. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of feeling like I have a bad case of the flu. I sleep with the window slightly open and the ceiling fan on. Joe freezes, but never complains. On a good day, if I have enough strength, I try to do a task or two to help Joe and Rebecca with the house work. Okay...enough complaining...I'll get off my pity potty and quit whining.

Speaking of Joe...this week is our anniversary. It's hard to believe how fast the years have passed. Joe and I met on August 31, 1974. We've had our ups and downs, good times and bad times, just like everyone else. My prayer is to have many more years together. Joe has been so loving and supportive. He takes me to all my appointments. He stays by my side the full six hours of my chemotherapy. He sits with me while I sleep and makes me laugh when I'm awake. He encourages me when I'm down. holding me tight when I cry. He has taken over the cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. He never complains and never makes me feel like a burden. He just keeps loving me and loves me more the next day. There are no words to express how much I love him. I appreciate all he does for me. I am so blessed to have him.

Okay...enough of the sappy stuff. I better get myself psyched for tomorrow. I feel a nap coming on.