It’s hard to believe it has been four weeks since my surgery. The surgery went well. I spent nine days in the hospital…nine  l o n g  days. The surgery was radical, but the doctors felt they had achieved optimal results. Two weeks after being discharged from the hospital, I had a follow up appointment with my surgeon. I asked him to explain the details of the surgery. (I really don’t remember much during my hospital stay due to heavy pain medication).  Joe and I didn’t realize how large the tumors were and how much cancer there was. The doctor removed my omentum, which was most diseased. He said if I hadn’t had it removed, I would have gone within 12 months. He removed tumors from my peritoneal and liver. A section of my colon and right diaphragm was removed also. He was unable to remove another tumor on my liver due to the size and thickness of the tumor. We are hoping this tumor responds to chemotherapy. I had chemotherapy on Thursday. We are praying I will only have to have two more treatments completing the 6 cycles.

My recovery has gone well with only a couple minor complications. The days are long and boring, but I’m comfortable and have had minimal pain. Thanks to medication, of course.

We have been blessed in so many ways. Joe’s work offered him the option to work from home. His manager, supervisor and coworkers have been incredible supportive. They felt Joe needed to be home to help me as much as possible. His out of town trips have been reduced also. We are so grateful for this blessing.

Joe did go on a trip this past week. Two of my dear friends drove me to the hospital for my chemo treatment and sat with me all day. The next day, they both spent the day at my house while I slept making sure I was ok. How loving is that?

It has been said that the greatest gift that can be given is to lay down one’s own life for another. Many of our loved one’s lives have been laid down, put on hold, and set aside as we fight for ours. It is truly a gift beyond measure.

Post Surgery!!

Hey Everyone! Sincere apologies I haven't made an update on Mom and her surgery!! Everything went great! She went in a champ and came out a champ! She spent one night in ICU for monitoring purposes and then was moved to another room to relax and heal. Doctor feels confident he got most of the cancer out and the chemo will be able to get the rest!! She's been healing ahead of schedule and is still her spit fire self and doesn't miss a beat!! Thank you for all the prayers, thoughts, flowers, and so much more! We appreciate it all and are so thankful for each and everyone of you!! I will post more when we get home and settled!!

Why is it every time I sit down to write, my mind goes totally blank? Maybe because there's not much going on. I've been trying to mentally prepare myself for surgery next week. Joe has been so encouraging and positive. He said I should look at the surgery as a blessing in disguise. He is right, it is a blessing. And I should be grateful it is available to me and that we have a highly recommended doctor to perform the surgery. 

Speaking of Joe...what would I do without him? He is always so positive and encourages me to keep fighting. When I run out of steam, he picks up and keeps going. When I'm awake at night, he is too, making sure I'm ok. Although I have no hair, my face is swollen, and sometimes I'm as pale as a ghost, he treats me beautiful. He is kind and thoughtful even when I'm ornery or sick. I am grateful how he loves me and cares for me. He has always treated me this way even during the bad times. He brings me flowers every birthday, anniversary and Mother's day. He loves his kids and grandchildren. He works hard to support our family. He involves me in his life, but shields me when it's too much. His faith is strong and I know he loves the Lord and the gospel. I appreciate all he does and i love him dearly. I'm thankful he is my partner and he is who he is. 

Anna will be coming home soon to help while I am recovering. I can't wait! I'm sure Joe and Rebecca can't either, it will relieve them a little. Rebecca has been the best nurse and housekeeper. I can only imagine what the house would look like if it weren't for her. Thanks Rebecca for all you do! 

My daughters will post how things are going while I'm down. I will take everyone's encouraging words, positive thoughts and love with me. Thanks everyone for lifting me when I need it most and for brightening my day. I love each and everyone of you! :-)

When ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God, Mosiah 2:17

We were deeply touched by the kind service from the Achievement Day girls from our ward. They surprised us with a delicious dinner. We enjoyed their sweet spirits and loved having them in our home. Aren't they beautiful? They are lucky to have two great leaders who are such great examples. Thank you girls and leaders!

My surgery is schedule for May 9th. I am still sorting through all the emotions I feel. I do know one thing for sure...I'm terrified! But like I said before, who wouldn't be?

Wow! Holy cow, what a day! The results of my CTC weren’t exactly what we expected. In our naïve minds we expected a yes or no answer to the question: is the cancer shrinking? The results indicated good news, bad news and unexpected news. I will attempt to explain the results and what the doctor said in the simplest terms. I know of no other way anyway. 

The CT scan was taken from the chest to the lower abdomen on 4/16/2012 (Happy Anniversary). It’s compared to the first one taken on 2/14/2012 (Happy Valentine’s Day).

The not so good news:
Lungs: there are three lumps that appear to be stable/not changing.

The good news/so so news:

Liver: a previously noted lesion of the liver is less conspicuous. YAY! However, (oh shoot) there is an apparent new small lesion on the liver. It was not evident on the prior scan.

The good good news:

The Primary Peritoneal Carcinoma aka Ovarian Cancer (yes, it is possible to have ovarian cancer without ovaries, cuz I’m proof) is responding to the chemotherapy. It is less conspicuous, in other words, it’s shrinking. Yippee!!

The bad news:

There is no significant change to the cancer on the omentum. The omentum is a fatty type apron that covers and protects the stomach.

Unexpected News:
Because the cancer on the omentum isn’t responding to chemotherapy, my doctor recommended having the omentum surgically removed. If other tumors can safely be removed, it will be done at this time also. This is referred to as debulking surgery.

Our options are: #1-have the surgery done now, in the middle of the six cycles of chemotherapy, or #2-have it done at the end of the six cycles of chemotherapy. My doctor explained the benefits of having it done now rather than waiting. After prayerfully considering his suggestion, we made the decision to have the surgery now. I will discontinue chemotherapy for now. After healing from surgery, I will continue the last three cycles of chemotherapy.

I am NOT looking forward to surgery! Honestly, who would be? However, I hope to gain a little strength and energy before surgery. And possibly grow a stubble of hair on my perfectly round, shiny white bald head.

We apologize for taking so long to post. I know many have been waiting to hear the results.  We needed some time to absorb everything that happened today. Because it’s impossible to call everyone, we wanted to make sure what we posted made sense. We hope we have accomplished this. We hope we haven’t confused you too much, but this really is a condensed version of the CTC.

Joe and I, our family, are deeply grateful for everyone’s support, positive thoughts, encouragement and love. Thank you all!

We are grateful for a loving, merciful, Heavenly Father who listens to our pleas and answers our prayers. We have witnessed his hand often guiding us and helping us fight this fight. We are grateful He has blessed us with all of you! We couldn't endure without each and everyone of you!

NO ONE FIGHTS ALONE!!!
We must fight a little harder, a little longer. :)

 Tomorrow is chemo day. I must admit I'm dreading it. :(

I have it in my head the side effects are going to be worse, that seems to be the pattern. It's hard to stay positive while experiencing muscles and bones ache, nausea and puking my guts out. Feeling queasy and constipated constantly are the norm. Sorry...TMI. My face and neck turn red, it feels like a sunburn, only burning from the inside out. I constantly feel a burning, numb, itchy sensation on the bottom of my feet and palms of my hands.  My face, especial my eyes, are puffy and swollen. My tongue is swollen and tingly. Swallowing has becme difficult. I get strange cravings. Avoiding dehydration is nearly impossible. I sleep ten hours, wake up tired and weak. I stumble downstairs, eat breakfast, then back upstairs for a nap. Getting ready for the day nearly wipes me right out. I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of feeling like I have a bad case of the flu. I sleep with the window slightly open and the ceiling fan on. Joe freezes, but never complains. On a good day, if I have enough strength, I try to do a task or two to help Joe and Rebecca with the house work. Okay...enough complaining...I'll get off my pity potty and quit whining.

Speaking of Joe...this week is our anniversary. It's hard to believe how fast the years have passed. Joe and I met on August 31, 1974. We've had our ups and downs, good times and bad times, just like everyone else. My prayer is to have many more years together. Joe has been so loving and supportive. He takes me to all my appointments. He stays by my side the full six hours of my chemotherapy. He sits with me while I sleep and makes me laugh when I'm awake. He encourages me when I'm down. holding me tight when I cry. He has taken over the cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping. He never complains and never makes me feel like a burden. He just keeps loving me and loves me more the next day. There are no words to express how much I love him. I appreciate all he does for me. I am so blessed to have him.

Okay...enough of the sappy stuff. I better get myself psyched for tomorrow. I feel a nap coming on.

It's almost time for my fourth treatment. My third treatment, March 29th, was similar to the first and second treatment, but the side effects were a little worse. The nausea, fatigue, weakness, muscles and bone aches, numbness in my feet and hands intensified. I suffer mental lapse and forgetfulness, which of course, is due to the chemo. ;) The good news is, I am half way through my treatments!

I have days when I am discouraged and wonder how much longer I can cope. I read this scripture and quote on the same day.

 ”Press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: ye shall have eternal life”
(2 Nephi 31:20)

I thought of what Christ went through for me. How could I complain? How could I forget all the pain and agony he suffered? How could I not ”endure to the end”? And not just to endure, but to endure well, to endure with faith and hope and courage.

President Uchtdorf said:

”...to all who suffer---to all who feel discouraged, worried or lonely---I say with love and deep concern for you, never give in.
Never surrender.
Never let despair to overcome your spirit.”

This was exactly what I needed. If I ”Press forward with a steadfastness in Christ.....ye shall have eternal life”. This promise is very comforting to me.

This weekend we took a small road trip to Henderson, Nevada to see our daughter, Anna. It turned out our son, David, and our other daughter, Rebecca, and all the grand kids went down too! We had a blast! I wasn't able to walk far so we took a wheelchair. Poor Rebecca pushed me around most of the time, and yes, she was sore the next day. It was so good to have everyone together.

Riley, Grace and Devon at the M&M Factory

Devon, Riley, Rebecca and Grace

Devon, Riley and Grace.

All of us eating breakfast. 

We had so much fun! I can't wait to go again!

Today, I had a CT scan to see if the tumor is shrinking. We should know the results by Thursday. I will post more then.

Have a happy week!